Presses Stopped: .NGONO Now Available!
JAMBIANA, Zanzibar (TLD Newswire) – Online adult entertainment entrepreneurs, your attentions please: Today marks the beginning of an opportunity you must not be missing!
If you thought the .XXX sTLD had rocked your worlds, wait until you feast the eyes on the incredible return of investments promised by the new .NGONO TLD, offered for your immense money-making pleasure by the respected, trusted and only twice-indicted Internet Registry Magic, Ltd. — the third most popular internet registrar in all the nation of Zanzibar.
“Internet users everywhere are looking for the best porno,” say IRM CEO Adnan Nitakula. “How much more intuitive can it be than typing ‘blowjob.ngono’ into one’s bar of web browsing when seeking graphic, high-quality depictions of the oral copulation? The answer is none — none more intuitive!”
Mr. Nitakula says “early adoptions” should take actions immediately to capitalist on super Sunrise Period discount and also maybe receive Fantastic Bonus Prize in a bargain.
“If you register today, you not only get 20% off price of splendid .NGONO domain names of your choice, you also get entry into raffle to win contents of bank account of the Nigerian Prince from whom we recently received official letter containing tremendous finances opportunity,” Mr. Nitakula explains. “As you know, transfers of monies involving Nigerian Princes are among the most trusted forms of pecuniary transactions in the world, so this is truly an offer of no-brain!”
When asked about potential for intellectual properties arguments involving things like the mark of trade holders, or famous companies who don’t want the porno associated with their talking cartoon lizards or “arches of gold” food dispensary branding, Mr. Nitakula says there are no reasons to worry for the holders of the rights, whether they are trade, copy or patent.
“We have a zero tolerance for the violations of the intellect properties like trademark dismemberment or copyright infractment,” say Mr. Nitakula. “You know this is true, because it say so very strongly in our official Term of Conditionals, which was written by man I trust implicitly, and who I also have no reason to believe is not my lawyers.”
Mr. Nikatula say when bad webmaster caught squatting on domain names in way that infracts on marks of trade or rights of Xerox, in addition to traditional WIPO-gifted repercussions of law, the perpetrator will be punished strictly according to wise and equitable laws of Zanzibar.
“First thing, we freeze the domain name pending conclusions of WIPO hearing on intellect property infractments,” Mr. Nikatula says. “Then, depending on rule of the court and domicile location of the Defendant, we behead, stone or drag Defendant behind jeep across desert for no less than 1.5 kilometers per infractment. If defendant not live within Zanzibar jurisdiction, we take .NGONO domain in question and give it to the plaintiff, and issue simple fatwah against Defendant, officially cursing Defendant and all his descendants at rate of two generations per infractment.”
As for positive and enhancing impacts on the porno business, Mr. Nikatula predicted a falling wind of revenue which will then gather into a wave of tidal money which then crash onto erotic entrepreneurism beaches all over the industrially sexual globe.
“The new .NGONO top-level domain will be to the internet porno what the .travel TLD has been to industry of the tourism,” Mr. Nitakula adds. “When was the last time you booked a hotel or flight through the .COM websites, after all? Hardly anybody remember property like Travelocity.com or Hotels.com nowadays. It’s all about the .travel sites now. Before long, I’m pretty sure we see Captain Kirk selling his corpulence on the Boulevard of Sunsets in Los Angeles, because nobody want to use his Line-Price no more.”
For more informations on registering .NGONO, contact Mr. Nikatula on the Skype at username MrNikatula99, or send all necessary authorizations for to make the deposits and withdrawals on your accounts of banking to Prince Adebayo Idiagbon, C/O Internet Registry Magic, Ltd., P.O. Box 55569, Baltimore, MD, 21223.