By Peter Berton

LOS ANGELES – Kelly Shibari has a lot going for her. A very popular plus-sized, Asian-American performer, Shibari has worked for studios including Evil Angel, Zero Tolerance, Evasive Angles, Rodney Moore, Devil’s Film, New Sensations and Red Light District. Her roles have resulted in numerous nominations for adult industry awards.

Shibari also writes for adult industry websites, runs her own public relations and marketing consultancy for the adult industry — the PRSM Group — and is a sought-after speaker about how to use social media as a marketing tool. That’s no surprise, since her Twitter followers number more than 61,000.

None of the forgoing is particularly surprising for an attractive, high-energy lady who worked hard to earn a spot in adult’s upper echelons. What is surprising about Shibari is that she never intended to be an adult entertainer.

YNOT: Seriously? You never intended to be a porn star?

Kelly Shibari: I had been working in mainstream film, television, infomercials and commercials as an art director and production designer for roughly 10 years when the big writers’ strike hit the industry hard in 2007. Just about everything in Hollywood came to a standstill. When the writers went on strike, so did the actors and the crew, and many people were out of work. Lots of people I knew ended up moving out of [Los Angeles] and back to their hometowns.

I wanted to stay in town and stay in entertainment somehow, and a friend of mine, who also worked in mainstream as a weapons specialist, suggested I get into porn. He and his girlfriend worked in adult as performers, and he thought I would do well.

My response was “there aren’t any fat girls in porn!” — mainly because the porn I had always watched was what we call “mainstream porn,” in which the girls are slender, sometimes augmented, and the men always fit and muscular. The only fat women I’d seen in any semi-nude pose, other than in museums, were those gag or joke postcards you see at the beach … you know, those “wish you were here” postcards with the 500-pound woman in a bikini.

But my friend showed me a few sites that featured larger girls in porn in a sexy, positive light. One of them was operated by the SCORE Group, a large company that shoots busty girls as well as BBWs [big, beautiful women].

I told my friend I would send in my photos to the SCORE Group, and if they accepted, I would [give performing a try]. I guess at the time they hadn’t seen too many Asian BBWs who were taller and naturally busty, because they took me right away. I really was initially intending for my time in porn to be a short-term sabbatical as I waited for the mainstream film and TV industry to recover, but I’m now in my sixth year in the business — and it’s been an absolute blast.

What is it like for you, being an Asian BBW star? Do you see yourself as a stereotype-breaker?

I didn’t realize at the time how few chubby Asian-American girls were in adult entertainment. Back in Japan, chubby-girl pocchari and kyonyu porn are pretty popular niches.

Here, most of the Asian performers are slender and athletic. Most with noticeable curves have implants. The few chubby Asian-American performers don’t stay in the industry very long — one or two titles and they’re gone, or they “retire” and come back over and over.
I didn’t get into the industry to break any stereotypes. I just happen to be a chubby Asian girl, and I’m just glad there are so many people who seem to like my performances and my look.

I have found that a large percentage of my fan base is made up of couples in which the girlfriend or wife is chubby and Asian. I’ve been told my scenes are the “approved” porn in their bedrooms because it doesn’t make the woman feel like she’s competing with what’s on the screen. Instead, she gets to feel more comfortable in her own skin because she sees someone with a similar figure having a good, sexy, fun time.

Being comfortable and confident is sexy, and if I’m helping couples get sexy, then I’m thrilled, regardless whether I break stereotypes or not.

What attracted you to being in the adult industry?

I’ve always been a fan of adult entertainment. Here in the States, it seems to have a negative stigma, but back home in Japan, sex and sexy entertainment are very open and accepted.

I’ve always had sexy images and sexuality around me, in print as well as on television. I guess I’ve always been open sexually as a result.

There are times I wish I had been confident enough to get into this industry 10 years sooner. I didn’t get in until I was 34. Talk about missing out on a decade of confident, sexy fun on camera!

Having that fun behind closed doors was enjoyable, though, and I guess that, plus my background in mainstream entertainment behind the scenes, was just perfect practice for my transition into porn.

What have been the high points of your career so far?

Where do I start? I’ve spoken at conferences, done a cameo in a Rammstein music video, been the only plus-size Fleshlight Girl ever, and served as the centerfold for the only AVN issue ever dedicated to BBWs. I’ve also seen my self-produced DVD nominated for a lot of awards — AVN, XBIZ, Feminist Porn Award — NightMoves — been included in the Periodic Table of Feminist Porn as one of the pioneers in feminist porn and won the eXXXotica Fanny Award for BBW Performer of the Year. It’s all been such an amazing ride.

I’m proud that I’ve been able to branch past my performing work and utilize my mainstream background to develop my brand into education as well as marketing and PR. I get to help package and promote other people in my industry and use what I know both in adult and mainstream to increase their visibility.

It’s so much fun, absolutely creative, and I couldn’t ask for more — though I do have a few other things in the works before I consider my bucket list completed. [She laughs.]

Does being in adult mean you get more respect as a BBW?

Not necessarily. There will always be people who judge you, especially in this country. I think the reason I’ve not gotten as much flack as some other performers is because I try to stay as logical and as classy as possible.

It’s not always possible, of course. Sometimes you’re taken advantage of and hurt, and there is plenty of drama in an industry that is so ego-based. However, working daily to stay above the fray and be as mature as I can be seems to be what has gotten me respect in most cases, regardless of my size.

In terms of confidence and sexuality, though, if my public persona has encouraged other plus-sized adults to feel less shame, have fun and enjoy their lives, then I’m super-happy about having been a part of their journey.

Are there any downsides to being in porn for you, personally?

Not really, for a few reasons. I didn’t get into the industry until I was older, and I actually spoke with my mom before I did.

I’ve always thought about my brand, and I’ve turned down lucrative shoots if [the material] conflicted with what I thought would be fun or positive.

I’ve tried different aspects of adult entertainment and not opted to do those things that I just don’t feel comfortable doing — and that includes stripping, webcamming and escorting. I’m a porn performer through and through, and I’d rather leave those who are great at those other things to do them rather than me.

I think being choosy has helped me avoid getting wrangled into the porn pitfalls you hear about. I’m also not much for partying — again, that might be because I’m older, or maybe that I’m just more square than most. [She laughs.] I get enough sleep, don’t overdo it and take personal time when I can.

On a non-performer level, I’ve dealt with my fair share of negativity. Again, this is an industry based on ego, and sometimes personalities don’t mesh.

One of the most common things you hear about the adult industry is how much it’s like high school. There are always going to be mean girls, drama queens and those who take advantage both personally and business-wise … and it’s not limited to just the girls.

When I first got into the industry, it was shocking. Over the years, I’ve learned to just take a big breath, laugh at the idiocy and concentrate on being happy.

I work regularly to get my Zen as much as I can. All that put together, and I think my experience in porn actually has been pretty positive.

What are your career goals? Where do you hope to be in 10 years?

I’m constantly thinking about what’s next. You have to, in this industry. With so many new girls always getting into the industry, plus social media being prevalent, fans, producers and directors all have ADD — and for good reason!

I would rather not be performing when I’m over 50. There are some mature performers who I absolutely love, and they have my ultimate respect, but it’s not for me.

Luckily, with the marketing and PR work I’m doing, plus the move into education and producing, the slow transition I’ve already started means I can stay happily inside an industry I love even if I’m not performing.

So in 10 years? I’m hoping to stay in this industry but in a support and creative capacity behind the camera.

What do few people know about you?

I’ll name three things: I’m fluent in Japanese, which I was able to showcase in a Wicked Pictures film this past year. There’s a very popular workout video that uses a set I designed and built … which is funny, because I obviously have not used that particular workout video! [She laughs.]

And finally, I don’t know how to ride a bicycle. Never learned; it’s my superhero weakness. If I were stuck on a planet where the only way to travel was to ride a bike, I just simply wouldn’t survive. Thank goodness that hasn’t happened!

Keep up with Shibari on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.