Golf Rookie Drops First Name to Avoid Porn Association
LOUISVILLE, KY — Don’t call him John. His name is now officially JB Holmes, because being confused with one of the most famous porn stars in American history isn’t something he feels promotes his career on the green. Of course, it doesn’t help that he’s known as “Long John” by fans familiar with his 310 yard flies off of the tee.
“I didn’t even know who John Holmes was at first,” the small ball player admitted to the press. “But I soon figured it out after people started calling me a porn star.”
According to 26-year-old professional golf rookie Holmes, that began at Taylor County High School while playing teen golf.
“I got tired of it pretty quickly – but other people didn’t,” he explained.
Whether other people have tired of the smirking association or not, Holmes now goes by “JB,” in part because of sexually savvy former US Tour pro, Gary McCord.
When the duo hit the green together, now sportscaster McCord decided a name change might be a good idea, and proposed the two letter nickname.
“Thankfully, it stuck, and that’s what everyone calls me now,” the ambitious putter and stroker reported.
Given that this Holmes suffers a bit of dyslexia, let’s hope he can stay focused not only when he’s winning tournaments, but signing autographs.