By Dave Cummings

YNOT – I realize this column is supposed to focus mainly on sex, but bear with me for a moment. Yes, the past month did include sex — lots and lots of sex — but there’s something else I’d like to address first. I’ll get back to the sex.

I was the U.S. Army officer who accompanied the Army Chaplain in Berlin in 1966 to notify wives of their husband’s death in Vietnam.

In Vietnam, I was the commanding officer of a 4th Infantry Division unit in 1968 during the Tet Offensive. Ambushes, rockets and mortars occurred nearly constantly. It was a combat situation, yet luckily, I lost none of my hundreds of soldiers thanks to a unique system of bunkers we built for refuge during the rocket attacks. Some soldiers experienced minor shrapnel wounds. Our base camp perimeter was the target of probes by Viet Cong trying to get inside our barbed wire and claymore mines to blow up helicopters and fuel bladders at the combat gunship airfield across the street from my command.

I’m now part of a large group of military retirees and veterans who participate in “Welcome Home” events at military bases for our troops returning from Middle East deployments. We also assist in escorting caskets, hearses and family members to mortuaries and military funerals, as well as in military ceremonies involving the “angel flights” that return fallen military personnel to San Diego and their families for burial.

Last Tuesday, at a San Diego-area Marine air base, we honored a 22-year-old Army Ranger who was killed in action (KIA) in Afghanistan the week before, escorting his hearse to a mortuary. Then, on Saturday, we escorted his family and participated in his funeral.

I’ve experienced combat, and I’ve seen and participated in some of what CBS showed recently on the Sunday Morning segment about the dignity with which the military returns KIA personnel to the U.S. The video at this link contains the report, describing almost exactly what we do here in San Diego.

The most recent duty — for the 22-year-old ranger — was an excellent example of how the military forms an extended family, especially in times of crisis. Despite th good-nature ribbing that goes on between the branches of the service, all of them come together to support and honor a fallen comrade in any branch.

Military police provided on-base escorts to the flight line for us, the family and the military honor guard, and many active duty folks who just wanted to be there to honor the fallen soldier, joined us in saluting the plane carrying his body as it landed and taxied up beside a giant Air Force C-5. Everyone, regardless of rank, maintained the salute as the sergeant’s casket was unloaded and placed into the hearse, and as the hearse later drove between our two lines of American flags.

Approximately 50 people then escorted the soldier to a mortuary eight to nine miles away. For that trip, as we were escorted from the runway and towards the exit leading to the freeway, Marines piled out of their work sites along the route to salute the hearse, and drivers pulled over and stood by their cars to salute or place their right hand over their heart. The actions were very impressive and sincere — something I wish every American could have witnessed.

The California Highway Patrol took over as we exited the base. Officer stopped traffic on the freeway, and they, local police and sheriff’s motorcycle authorities facilitated our convoy to the mortuary 11 miles north of the base. For the funeral on Saturday, we formed an American flag honor guard to salute the sergeant as he left the mortuary, and again at his gravesite 23 miles away in a Veterans Administration national cemetery.

Besides the above, I have been privileged to participate in other military events, too. Two weeks ago, our group formed a patriot guard line of American flags for a retiree’s military funeral at the newly opened VA National Cemetery bordering a San Diego Marine base. Since most of his career was in Army Intelligence, a U.S. Army Honor Guard was a major part of the funeral, including the presentation of the American flag to his wife and the playing of “Taps.” It was somber. Afterwards, as a retired U.S. Army lieutenant colonel, I sought out the Army Honor Guard and thanked them for being there and for their dignified participation.

The next evening as marines and sailors were returning from a seven-month Middle East deployment, we were there with our lines of American flags for them to walk between and into the arms of their families. I particularly focused upon welcoming home those single men and women (yes, there are also military women serving in Iraq and Afghanistan) who didn’t have family there to greet them. As I was driving home, I was reminded that I almost had tears of sadness during the previous day’s funeral, and in contrast experienced tears of joy for those returning safely from overseas combat zones. I also feel a little bit like I am comfortably back in the military, though in a different role!

Swingers are family of a different type. (Didn’t I say I’d get back to sex?) Swinger events abound in San Diego, so I have inserted myself into that social crowd, something made easier for this single guy because I’m “Dave Cummings, porn star.” Many women want to know if they are pretty and sexy enough to get a porn star “up” and off. And husbands are so proud of their mates that they sometimes arrange the session.

Swingers are a cross-section of American society, so there are all ages, sizes, shapes and personalities. They are happy people, the kind I enjoy hanging out with, and their culinary skills for potluck events are legendary. For them, sex is sex, and lovemaking is for their spouse.

Fortunately, besides formal swinging events, I get to partake in “sex fun” with them at other times, too. Besides swinging, there are many women who just want a no-strings-attached sex session from time to time. My challenge is to make time for them in between the many other things I do. If they are at least 18 and reasonably attractive, willing to use condoms and are breathing, I’m usually agreeable to play with them. Yes, I prefer the younger ones, but I have to admit that some of the middle-aged females are fabulous in bed!

Dave Cummings, “the world’s oldest porn star,” is a performer, producer and director. Visit him online at DaveCummings.com, DaveCummings.tv or DaveCummingsVOD.com or call and chat with him live at DaveCummingsInfo.com.