Natural breasts, nature and disasters, health and sex are all part of life.First, the natural breast aspect. In another hour or two, I’ll be shooting another sex scene for my “Knee Pad Nymphos” series with Lexi Bardot. She called an hour ago from Los Angeles to confirm that she’s already on the road and will be arriving at my condo here in San Diego in approximately another hour; she has the nicest natural breasts, and just typing this on my keyboard is exciting me. Now, I also like enhanced breasts on women, but the natural ones are what they were born with when they started out in life. Lexi and I “worked with” each other in a sex scene two weeks ago, and it was hot! Her boobs are gorgeous, sexually arousing to touch and lick (especially when she’s riding me in the cow girl position, like she did in our last shoot), and nice to slide a cock between. Lexi is a 5’10” natural beauty with an enthusiastic zest for being on her knees with a penis in her mouth. In the scene we did recently, she played a nurse who was stopping by to clean and change the bandage from some recent basal cell skin cancer that was surgically removed from the side of my nose. Yes, she was pressing those gorgeous breasts against my chest, and then checked my blood pressure by putting her stethoscope on my penis (note that I’m using the term “penis” instead of the word “cock” – as I’ve aged, I’ve tried to add a little “class” to my vocabulary). Long story short, we caught it all on film for later release, and I can’t wait for the doorbell to ring so I can let “Nurse” Lexi in for some more sex fun. I think I’ll have her play a nurse again, this time to check the stitches I’ve got from being hit by some flying glass three days ago; more about that later.

Between hurricanes, wild fires, earthquakes, and other natural disasters, it seems like nature has garnered a lot of news coverage lately. One of nature’s happenings of late was the Chatsworth wild fire, which began in the San Fernando Valley area of Los Angeles and burned 21,000 acres just west of the porn capital of the world. For me, the day of that scary wild fire began just as routinely as all the shoots I participate in for Wildlife Production’s “Screw My Wife, Please” acclaimed series, this one being Volume 51. After driving up the curvy one-lane dirt road to the shoot location high up on a hill overlooking beautiful country and city scenery, I met with Director Bobby Rinaldi, stopped by the make-up room to meet the folks scheduled to be in the first sex scene, had a fabulous breakfast, did paperwork, and participated in the “intro” that Bobby and I always do for the series. Everything was so wonderfully normal, organized and fun, including the head I got from one of the wives during the BTS (Behind the Scenes) filming; but, because the wind was blowing quite hard, we joked on film that the first wife sucking my penis was “blowing in the wind.” During the second scene, we heard helicopters flying noisily overhead, and one of the Wildlife Productions crew members alerted us that there was a lot of smoke just north of us and that the helicopters were grabbing water from the large pond down the hill from us and dropping it over the hill onto a fire.

After the “money shot” for that scene, we broke for lunch and watched the firefighting effort which now numbered four choppers constantly flying just 100 feet overhead grabbing water, dumping it on the fire, and hurriedly returning for more water. Director Bobby Rinaldi adroitly shepherded us through the next scene while also making arrangements with cast members for the remaining scenes to meet us at another location in case we had to leave the present location. As anticipated by Director Rinaldi, police were no longer letting non-residents up to our shooting location, so cast members for scenes four and five couldn’t get to our present location. Ironically, we watched the live coverage of the fire on television as it showed the helicopters constantly flying over our location. We incorporated the firefighting into the BTS filming, quickly but safely completed the third sex scene, and headed to our cars to get out of there. In our parking lot were two fire trucks preparing to provide “structure protection,” if needed. We caravanned down the hill, while motorcycle cops were coming up it to advise that the situation had become a mandatory evacuation matter. Glancing to the north while driving down the hill, we could see the flames just 400-500 yards north of our location. Certainly, as always, this “Screw My Wife, Please” will be SMOKING HOT!

After arriving at the re-location studio and getting set up for filming more wives getting sexually screwed, the television coverage reported a shift in winds, so the house we had left apparently was not destroyed. We finished filming scenes four and five by 10 PM, and I drove back to San Diego while listening to live radio coverage of the fire, one that would take another few days to get under control. The firefighting teams did a great job at minimizing the damage of this act of nature.

Health-wise, as I mentioned above, the basal cell skin cancer on the side of my nose has been surgically and successfully removed. This reminds me to urge everyone to be ever mindful of the need to use sun block. The force of nature, even the Sun, can be destructive at times. It’s part of life on Earth.

A few days ago during a freak accident-in-the-home, some glass shattered and hit me, causing a mini-gusher of blood to shoot out my forearm. It seemed like a dream, and I was hoping to hurriedly awaken from it, but I quickly wrapped a large then-white washcloth around it, twisted the cloth tightly to slow down the spurting blood, and drove to the VA Hospital five blocks away. Driving while trying to keep my arm up and held tightly was not easy. A federal cop near the Emergency Room entrance saw the now bright-red blood-soaked washcloth and acted like a fullback blocking for a halfback in getting me into a room where a nurse got the bleeding stopped. A physician subsequently injected some painkillers and then put six stitches in my arm. On the way home, it dawned on me that changing the forearm bandage could be yet another “nurse type” set-up for the scene with Lexi.

Flash! I hurriedly wrote the last paragraph just as Lexi Bardot was ringing my doorbell. All I can say is – WOW! Lexi is great to “work with.” Since I use a system of mirrors in some of my shoots, I noticed in one of the mirrors that she was playing with her vagina (see, I used a classy term, instead of calling it her pussy), and was able to film it while she was sucking my cock – oops, I should have said penis! Yup, sex is natural, just like Lexi’s boobs!

In closing this month’s column, let me thank all the fine folks who work so hard to help those adversely affected by nature; America has a lot of heroes who assist in dealing with nature’s earthquakes, wildfires, hurricanes, etc. Let’s also acknowledge YOU for your monetary generosity to those victims of nature’s tantrums, and for your thoughts and prayers on their behalf. Now, let’s all be nice to others, not just because it’s the American way, but because it’s the right thing to ALWAYS do!