YNOT – Due somewhat to the duress the porn world is under because of widespread piracy and the resulting slowdown of porn productions and other adult entertainment happenings, my monthly columns are getting bland and lacking in sex stuff. Gosh, before I know it, I might have to resort to lamenting about the hassles of being 70 years old, or the widening gap between my age and the younger adult actresses I work with or see in media press releases and reports. Ho-hum. Almost everything is relative, which lengthens the number of years between their age and mine.

Notwithstanding the filming slowdown, being old and wrinkly got me a booking last week with 23-year-old starlet Adrianna Kelly in a porn shoot emphasizing the age difference between her role as a college student and mine as a college professor. Billy Banks Productions booked and coordinated the shoot, one that Adrianna and I especially enjoyed because of the professional way he had everything organized, prepared and ready to film. From the time I walked in the door until the post-shoot hug as “my student” and I said goodbye in the parking lot was less than two hours. I was impressed.

After the three-hour drive from San Diego to the shoot location in Canoga Park, Calif., I met Adrianna, freshened up and changed into wardrobe, did paperwork and posed with her for approximately 20 pre-shoot nonsexual photos and 120 hardcore shots. As Adrianna was unzipping my trousers for the photos, she told me that sucking cock was her favorite thing to do, and that she enjoys shoots with older men. I got as hard as a rock, thankful that I wouldn’t be needing that blue pill I carry around in my car in case of an unexpected need for it.

We practiced our dialogue while we did the photos, which included oral and five sexual positions. Dang, shooting photos for all the sex positions was exciting and sexy, especially knowing that we’d soon be repeating them in the 45 minutes of hardcore video.

We then re-freshened up and started fucking our way through the scenario and the different sex positions. Adrianna was enjoying herself, and I was full of stamina and rigid penile wood. We made good use of the classroom desk and a chair, and she insisted on doing fellatio on me even when we briefly stopped to adjust lights, drink some water or apply lube. What an orally conscientious and “attentive” student she was!

It was a fun and very sexual shoot. As I was driving home, I was reminded how much the shoot seemed as realistic as a session with one of my groupie coeds, except that I was paid for this get-together/filming with Adrianna.

As you might recall from past columns, I do San Diego police ride-along shifts every year. Ten days ago, an officer on patrol provided cover for a parole officer who was checking the house of a parolee. Sadly, the cover officer was fatally shot by an assailant. More than 4,000 law-enforcement individuals, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Gov.-Elect Jerry Brown attended the three-hour funeral. The procession to the huge Rock Church in San Diego included many hundreds of police and fire vehicles. The officer was a top-notch patrol officer, father and all-around good guy who was well liked and respected. I attended the funeral.

I had a couple of additional matters to include in this column, but out of respect for the officer who died, I’ll instead include them next month.

Dave Cummings, “the world’s oldest porn star,” is a performer, producer and director. Visit him online at DaveCummings.com, DaveCummings.tv or DaveCummingsVOD.com.