For T-Girl Paige, Stripping Is the Road to Acceptance
Hidden away in the industrial west end of Toronto is a little basement strip club called The Lounge. Run by a downtown Toronto pansexual bar called Goodhandy’s (info about both can be found at www.ladyplus.com), The Lounge presents T-Girl/Shemale strippers every Tuesday and Wednesday night. On Thursdays, the girls go to Goodhandy’s for the weekly T-Girl night. Some even work there during the rest of the week.Paige is one of The Lounge’s regular T-Girl strippers. A beautiful raven-haired T-girl from the Philippines, she tends bar at Goodhandy’s on Saturdays when not performing at The Lounge.
YNOT caught up with Paige recently to ask about her life as a T-Girl entertainer. She surprised us by saying that stripping is not just a job, but something that makes her feel more accepted in the world for who she is.
YNOT: Please tell us a bit about yourself:
Paige: I was born and raised in the Philippines. I left at the early age of 14 to come to Canada to finish my school and get a chance for a better life.
As for being a T-Girl, we all know that Southeast Asia produces a lot of beautiful T-Girls. In my family, I am not the only one. I have a cousin who is a T-Girl who is only a year older than me. She and I grew up as girls.
Everything about me had never been about being a boy. Mentally, emotionally and physically 95-percent, I am a girl.
Let me tell you a story to explain when I found out what I am . Back home at the age of 10, I was sweeping my room and leaning down. In doing so, I was being girly; holding my T-shirt so no one can see through it. My aunts made fun of me and asked, “What are you hiding there? Your boobs?”
As to my steps to become a full fledged girl? They began after I came to Canada, at age 15. I started taking birth control pills from my sister’s stash.
Come to think of it, I am sure she knows that I was the one who was taking them because women’s pills are supposed to be taken every day, and somehow she was missing days from her pills. Most kids take cigarettes from their loved ones. I, on the other hand, took birth control pills from my sister.
YNOT: How did you become a stripper?
Paige: Before I was introduced to the industry, I was working on my second career. I had a degree in social service work and was finishing my schooling as a clinical esthetician. The T-Girls I met while studying for this job were working in the escort industry. On weekends I spent some time “double-dating” with one of my friends to make extra money to spend clubbing, shopping, and gallivanting freely.
In doing the escort work, little did I know that I was slowly becoming comfortable being with guys who search for girls like us and were willing to spend their disposable money on us .
I worked as a clinical esthetician until one day I realized that I was working myself to the bone, yet still had no money to support my needs and my desire to go through my surgery. So I started doing escort work part-time to pay for my breast augmentation, while still working at my regular day job as a clinical esthetician.
Four years ago, The Lounge opened, and a few of my Filipino T-Girl friends were working there. At the end of its first year, I was introduced to the scene by watching the show; and in no time
I was signed up by my friends to dance the following week.
My first night was crazy. I couldn’t stop giggling and trying to get off the stage while saying, “Sorry, I can’t do this. Yet today, now that years have past, I have become a real stripper and am now very comfortable dancing and entertaining guys.
YNOT: What is stripping like for you?
Paige: When I’m out there, I’m in my element. The “Stripper Paige” comes out and I am there to have a good time and be with my girlfriends.
For T-Girls like us, stripping is not just something we do for money: We consider it to be real job. It is something we prepare ourselves for by picking what to wear and what music to dance to. It gives us something to look forward to rather than just staying at home.
The Lounge is a place where we are alive as human beings, and wanted. A few girls have even found long-life partners. Meanwhile, all the guys who come to see us, I consider them to be friends. We get to know our admirers as good friends.
Over the years, we at The Lounge became a strong family and the devoted ones like me staying with our owners Todd and Amanda. Last year they opened up Goodhandy’s in downtown Toronto. Combined, The Lounge strip club and Goodhandy’s bar gives us girls the opportunity to work regular jobs, plus a “home” to come to and relax, to be entertained, to meet new friends, and to be free.
YNOT: Is there a difference between being a she-male stripper, and a male stripper?
Paige: Personally, there are huge differences between she-male strippers and male strippers. Our admirers come from all walks of life. Straight and bi men and women come to see us. Some are single guys and some are married, and they even bring their wives or girlfriends.
How do I explain our attraction? I personally think of us T-Girl strippers as a special dish that you keep craving.
YNOT: What has being a stripper done for you?
Paige: Being a stripper has made me realize who I am and what I am. I personally don’t feel that I have to wait for the night to be alive.
The years I have been dancing have helped me put a roof to my head and food in my fridge. I am currently finishing my medical aesthetics, and working as a stripper I have managed to save up for my school. Some of the girls manage to save money for their surgeries. Without The Lounge we will be lost souls.
YNOT: Has Goodhandy’s become a home for T-Girls as well?
Paige: When we opened the Goodhandy bar last year, the place attracted both the gay and straight communities. It is now a home for gays, lesbian, transvestites, crossdressers, drag queens and kings, plus our straight admirers to come and be entertained and make friends. Working as a bartender on Saturday nights, I feel that the community has opened up to us transsexuals/T-Girls. We are no longer hated and misunderstood. The social scene at Goodhandy’s made us more friendly to each others.
YNOT: Finally, has the time come for she-males to attain the kind of erotic reverence normally reserved for straights and gays?
Paige: I personally feel that it is time for she-males to be portrayed as erotically and beautifully as males and females. At The Lounge and Goodhandy’s, we have raised the respect and treatment of she-males as living sensual beings. It is time for this to happen in the broader world as well.
One last thought: A friend once asked me, “do you know who are the loneliest people on this planet?” I said no, and she replied, “The loneliest people on this planet are transsexuals!”
Growing up. I’ve learned what she meant. We are in between male and female. Gay guys have gay guys, lesbians have lesbians, and us transsexuals have no one. We want straight guys but we can’t keep them. Even today, for many people, we are still nothing but a figment of their imagination. We are not real.
I just hope that the new generation will be lucky enough to say, “I found my love and I am his for keeps!”