Fan Not Sure He Wants To Be ‘Immersed’ In Porn
YORK, Neb. – Standing in front of the E-Roticapalooza tradeshow booth for VirtuaVag Vienna, a new European adult entertainment studio specializing in 3D virtual reality porn, long-time porn fan Burt Riley looks more than a little uncomfortable as he considers donning the virtual reality goggles he’s holding in his hands.
“Look, I love porn as much as the next guy, maybe even a little more than the next guy, but I’m still not sure how I feel about being totally surrounded by it,” Riley says, slowly turning the goggles and glancing down at them like he’s puzzling over an artifact discovered on an archaeological dig. “I mean…. I’m not going to get some dude’s spunk on me if I’m too close to the chick when he shoots, right? Because I ain’t into that shit.”
Manning the booth, VirtuaVag representative Bjorn Frey patiently explains while the action will look incredibly real, the porn performers aren’t actually going to be present with Riley as he explores the 3D environment.
“Friend, you will be part of the action, yes, but only in the way which is virtual,” Frey says. “But it’s the next best thing to really being there.”
Looking equal parts unconvinced, skeptical and suspicious, Riley frowns and narrows his eyes. “OK then; will I get any of the dude’s virtual spunk on me?”
As he makes clear in an interview after walking away from the VirtuaVag booth, it’s not just concerns over making contact with three-dimensional semen which give Riley pause over the idea of taking the virtual porn plunge.
“When I was talking to that Australian fella at the booth back there about their little virtual porn helmet doohickey, he kept talking about how ‘immersive’ it was,” Riley says. “And to be honest, I just ain’t sure I really want to be ‘immersed’ in porn. It makes me wonder about a lot of things in porn I really never wanted to think about – like whether anal sex has any kind of virtual smell to it, for starters.”
Frey says while Riley’s resistance is a bit stronger than others, this isn’t the first time he’s run into confusion and hesitance from people who haven’t yet experienced virtual porn.
“It can be a little daunting, especially for older people who think maybe it will be like the holodeck on Star Trek, so they worry about their wife walking in and seeing them with their penis inside a Klingon or some green alien woman, or whatever,” Frey chuckles. “And for Americans, too, I think it is more an issue than with Europeans, mostly because so many of you are really very stupid, especially about science and technology. This may sound rude, but you know what they say: The truth, it can be a thing most hurtful, especially for the senseless American.”
Germane Mulligan, a freelance journalist, adult industry analyst and host of the “Top O’ The Pornin’ To You” podcast says Frey’s “stunning anti-American bias” notwithstanding, he largely agrees with the Austrian’s analysis concerning potential obstacles to consumer adoption of virtual reality porn.
“If you’re someone who hasn’t been to a 3D movie or tried other virtual reality applications before, the idea of being literally surrounded by genitalia and fluids is understandably disconcerting,” Mulligan says. “Of course, when you’re in the virtual porn environment, you aren’t really swimming in a sea of sweat and semen, but you can see how the occasionally heavy-handed marketing of virtual reality can give the novice user such an impression. They hear ‘immersive’ and they immediately imagine being dipped in porn like some sort of chocolate-covered cookie in its last step of production.”
Other consumers visiting the VirtuaVag booth seem somewhat more enthusiastic about the virtual porn concept, albeit no better informed on the subject than Riley.
“Something’s wrong,” mutters Dan Albion, a single 41 year-old realtor from nearby Grand Island. “I keep trying to grab this one girl’s tits, but some other guy seems like he just won’t stop banging her no matter what I do, and she keeps talking about how good I feel inside her pussy, even though I’m nowhere near her pussy. That don’t make no sense.”
“The 3D thing is pretty neat, but I don’t know how real it feels, to be honest,” Albion adds, “On the other hand, the part where some other guy is banging her and I can’t get any is the story of my fucking life, so maybe this stuff VR porn is pretty real, after all.”