BDSM Deaths Raise Legal Quandaries in Massachusetts
LYNN, MA — A year ago, “Master” Gary LeBlanc played host to British sub Adrian Exley and did what his guest had asked him to do. LeBlanc bound Exley in thick plastic and duct tape, put a leather hood on his head, and placed a plastic straw in his mouth to breathe through. Both men ended up dead from the exchange — Exley suffocated and LeBlanc from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in a New Hampshire Wal-Mart parking lot after writing a five page letter outlining his version of what happened.The two — Exley as “Studpup” and LeBlanc as “Rubrman” — had met through a gay BDSM online forum. LeBlanc built a dungeon in the basement of him home, complete with rubber mats on the floors and walls, chains, leather restraints, rubber suits, and a hospital gurney.
What followed was a three-day BDSM play session that ended when a third man discovered that Exley was not breathing.
Exley had been put in a closet while bound in plastic up to his neck and left alone for several hours, according to a lawsuit filed by his family.
In his suicide note, LeBlanc admitted that Exley at one point had trouble breathing, but he said that after “cooling him down,” Exley came back to consciousness. LeBlanc said that he went to sleep about 3:00am but was woken up a few hours later by friend Scott Vincent, who told him Exley was not breathing and was turning blue and cold.
LeBlanc said he panicked, and then he and Vincent drove to Hopkinton, RI, where they buried the body in a makeshift grave and threw away the dead man’s clothing and ID. Exley was identified by his dental records and Vincent is being charged by the state of Rhode Island for failing to report his death. The state of Massachusetts has yet to file charges against Vincent.
Exley’s family is now suing both LeBlanc’s estate and Vincent, but there is some question as to whether the two men can be held liable for the risky play that Exley definitely consented to, to some degree. Exley’s family is suing LeBlanc’s estate for unspecified damages, claiming wrongful death. Many in the BDSM lifestyle and webmasters with BDSM-focused sites are watching the case closely, seeing it as instruction in where to draw the line of responsibility on consensual but dangerous sex.
Lawyers for Exley’s estate acknowledge that Exley wanted to participate in a bondage session, but say that Exley did not know about LeBlanc’s reputation as an “extreme edge player.”
“Just because you are agreeing that you will allow someone to tie you up temporarily as part of role-playing doesn’t mean that you are consenting to be killed or to be left alone or to be abused,” attorney Randy Chapman said.
“There’s definitely the whole spectrum of thought on what really happened — whether it was a consent issue, or negligence or misunderstanding,” said Vivienne Kramer, a board member of the New England Leather Alliance, to the press. “Everybody has their own ideas on what should have happened.”
Former partners of LeBlanc’s who came forward after Exley’s death told police that LeBlanc had restrained them and left them alone for long periods or ignored their requests that he end a bondage session.
Both actions go against well-established, common sense bondage protocols, which say participants must stop if their partner uses a prearranged “safe word” or “safe signal” and must not leave anyone who is bound alone, said Susan Wright, a spokeswoman for the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom.